Rumours earlier this year that Morrisseymight run for London mayor were enough Todd Wisenbaker of Californian band La Sera and and he’s flown straight into campaign manager mode, writing a manifesto for the former Smith. In a guest column he explains why “Why I’m Voting For Morrissey, whether he’s on the ballot or (and not for Trump)!”
He’s punk. He’s anti-establishment. He’s anti-authority. He sparks conversation. He has passions just like mine. He has been using his art as a platform for sharing his political and social views since the early 80s and has spawned countless vegetarians. At a time when Donald Trump is literally our republican front runner, the silly notion that the singer for THE GREATEST BAND OF ALL TIME is running for any sort of elected office, isn’t really so strange. So yes, I’m backing Morrissey for mayor of London. As a 20 plus year fan of The Smiths and Morrissey I have bonded with fans all over the world and they usually have one thing in common; they are decent and somewhat socially aware human beings. That says something about the man.
And Londoners just imagine what your city would be like with him in charge. Obviously everyday would be like Sunday, meaning Columbia Road’s Sunday Flower Market would be the Everyday Flower Market! Plus you can have a (vegetarian) Sunday roast every day too if you like…
As for dealing with your legendary public transport systems in London, Moz will be implementing own brand of transportation with the following Morrissey-esque policies – all with with a promise of getting you nowhere fast of course. I don’t think Londoners will like that motto but they’ll get used to it! Ditch the underground and bike around the city on a mildly punctured bicycle. Double deckers will remain as a slightly quicker alternative, as well as 10 ton trucks for bigger journeys. For a more personalised way of getting around, there will be a new bespoke car service for ‘driving your girlfriend home’. The latter will feature smooth leather passenger seats in your very own boy racer chauffeured car with non stop service to your home or their home – even if you’re welcome no more!
Ok, enough song titles as policies. I believe that Moz is seen differently in the UK than here in Los Angeles, (I’ve read his autobiography!), and not all of you are prepared to throw your support behind Morrissey, but just think for a second: Imagine if Moz was elected mayor and – God forbid – Donald Trump becomes US president too (you Brits are really lucky that the Donald isn’t British, by the way). At least in that doomsday scenario for America imagine how awkward, unpleasant and ultimately fun to watch President Trump’s first state visit to London would be? A Boy With A Thorn In His Side and then some.
So Londoners don’t think of free bikes and clean streets when you elect a mayor this spring, think of future proofing yourself against a visit from Uncle Donald. So please, please, please give my boy Morrissey an honest shot.
With love and respect,
Todd Wisenbaker Moz Angeles, Ca
For more head to Iamkatygoodman.com.
